Trust in Trust
Friday, March 12, 2010 at 2:58PM by Jonathan Hakakian Historically, relationships have built trust over time through in-person meetings, phone calls, off-site retreats, trust exercises, references, and even e-mails, but today’s work environment has evolved:
- IM/chat, Skype, VoIP… have made [immediate] global communication free (or nearly so).
- Google, Wikipedia, Delicious… have made near-perfect information available to all instantaneously.
- Smart phones have created 24/7 work schedules.
- Facebook, LinkedIn… have connected people who had nearly forgot about each other, while Twitter has shrunk our most basic thoughts to 140 characters.
So with all of this going on, with communication evolving, how do we build trust in today’s fast-paced, digital world? We use the same methods as before while taking advantage of a few new tools.
A year ago I was at the end of an apartment hunt, committing to moving into a beautiful (and conveniently located) apartment. Of course, all was too good to be true and it fell through 2 days before my current lease was up. Scrambling, I connected with my second-choice apartment, which was thankfully still available, but the landlord was living halfway across the globe. In a short amount of time I had to convince her that I was responsible and well-suited for the apartment, without the convenience of a face-to-face or even a telephone conversation – everything done via IM and e-mail. I wired the first and last months’ rent as well as a security deposit immediately, also sending her contact information for my previous landlord. But most importantly, I friended her on Facebook, without any restrictions, giving her unfettered access to my life*.
This allowed her to see that I wasn’t smoke and mirrors but a real person, with a personality and interests and more importantly, a few hundred “friends” who verified my existence by interacting with me on a personal level through wall postings, comments, groups, and tagged photos.
This was all in an effort to abide by the key determinants of building trust set long ago: transparency and honesty. Using new-age tools I was able to overcome the geographic hurdle more quickly and with a condensed and concentrated effort.
I finally met her last month after over a year of living in her apartment. What made her trust me? She replied simply, “Instinct.”
If I hadn’t gone out of my way to be open and honest with her, would the outcome have been the same? What are your thoughts? What would you have done if you were my landlord? Or me?
*I keep my FB profile tidy: there are no inappropriate pictures or comments nor anything that I wouldn’t openly share with my employer/landlord/parents.
? Trust in Trust by Blues Traveler, listen on Lala.com: http://www.lala.com/song/432627047859234408 (Album: Run-Around; Track 2)
Reader Comments (3)
Well said, Jonathan. Building trust needs to be instantanous in this fast pace world we live in. The digital tools you refer to gives us that ability to learn about people to both give and gain trust. I am always amazed by people who still haven't learned to "clean up" their profiles on social networking sites. Everyone is looking at them.
Trust is an extremely important quality and how people form and sustain trust are as complex and different as there are people. You can read the various answers to the question "What Does Trust Mean to You/" on my LinkIn discussion on:
http://www.linkedin.com/groupAnswers?viewQuestionAndAnswers=&gid=2542916&discussionID=10841875&goback=%2Eanh_2542916
Thanks for the comments Andy and Stephen!
Andy, great point that "everyone is looking" - would you be comfortable if your Facebook Wall was a billboard along the highway?